Obi-Wan Kenobi, he get by on jedi pension,
He now suffer from arthritis -- constipation not to mention!
Try to use El Force-o, brain all dried up like adobe!
HEY, BEN KENOBI!
Wookie El Chewbacca show off shaggy Bigfoot torso!
He member of El Hair Club --La Rogaine now endorso!
Han Solo, he comprende --Wookie lingo mucho screwy!
HEY, SENOR CHEWY!
Flyboy is Han Solo, hot to jump Princess Leia!
But Leia, she play hardball, never give him time of day-a!
Han no give a damn --so Indy Jones his primo role-o!
HEY, FLYBOY SOLO!
Bimbo Princess Leia she play hard to get, by golly!
When she strip down to her skivvies, she one very hot tamale!
Mucho kicks she gets when men they bow down, and obey-a!
HEY, PRINCESS LEIA!
Dark Side turn Darth Vader into deep-space Dr. Death-o!
He turn off Rebels plenty with his wheezy morning breath-o!
Whole planets he wipe out --no one to stop him like Ralph Nader!
HEY, LORD VADER!
Jedi Maestro Yoda he no bigger than a taco!
Come across like a drop-out Muppet --ears he steal from Mr. Spock-o!
Lives on a distant planet --no one sure of his Zip Code-a!
HEY, MAESTRO YODA!
Jabba fat like Limbaugh --grande glutton roly-poly!
He pig out on compadres --make them instant guacamole!
Soon el groundo shake-o with a belcho furloso!
HEY, JABBA GROSSO!
Luke-o all shook up when learn Darth Vader is his padre!
Find out Leia she his sister --hope that Jabba not his madre!
Mucho stupefied like gringo bombed out on Sambucco!
HEY, SENOR LUKE-O!
Gabby droid See-Threepio he big pain in el but-to!
All the time he fuss and worry --his big mouth he never shut-o!
Other droids they think a closet gay he just might be-o!
Robot Artoo-Deetoo he computer mucho grande!
So smart that even Windows 95 he understande!
Glad to show you some cyber-porn once price you both agree to!
HEY, ARTOO DEETO!
- George Lucas:
Viva Star Wars movies and el megabucks they gross-o!
Viva profits tremendoso!
Viva dolls and comic books and t-shirts we supplying!
HEY, KEEP ON BUYING!
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